In partnership with
Morning — it’s Clay.
I’m experimenting with something new here. Instead of an intro, I’m adding a Key Takeaways section to keep things clear and skimmable. Let me know what you think.
🔥 Key Takeaways
Your kids learn who to become by watching how you live, not by listening to what you say.
Seeing you try, struggle, and keep going teaches resilience better than any speech ever could.
One goal pursued visibly can change the energy, presence, and leadership you bring into your home.
The Example You’re Setting (Whether You Mean To or Not)
Raising kids is strange.
They ignore you when you’re trying to teach them something important, but let one F-bomb slip and suddenly they’re laser-focused.
Still, every once in a while, they surprise you.
They repeat something you didn’t know they heard.
They copy a habit you didn’t know they noticed.
They reflect back a version of you you didn’t realize you were showing them.
Because whether we like it or not, our kids are always watching.
Not what we say—what we do.
Words Don’t Teach. Patterns Do.
We tell our kids:
You can be anything.
Hard work matters.
Take responsibility
But here’s the uncomfortable question:
Do they see you living that way?
If they watch you coast, complain, stay stuck, and blame everyone else that’s the lesson.
If they watch you glued to your phone while telling them to put theirs down, that’s the lesson.
Kids don’t follow advice.
They follow examples.
Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.
What This Looks Like (In Real Life)
This doesn’t require speeches or dramatic life changes.
It looks like:
Training for something and letting them see you sweat.
Working on a side project at the kitchen table.
Picking up a guitar again—even if you’re rusty (that’s a reminder for me).
Learning something new instead of numbing out every night.
Your kids don’t need a perfect dad.
They need a dad who’s still going for it.
Why This Matters More Than You Think
When you’re chasing something meaningful, you show up differently.
You have more energy.
More presence.
More patience.
More grit.
When you’re not?
You fade.
You coast.
You go through the motions.
And your family feels that—even if they can’t name it.
A disengaged man is like a fire burned down to embers.
Still there, but not warming anyone.
A man with a goal?
That fire spreads.
(Campfire Gentleman—see what I did there?)
Let Them See the Struggle
Your kids don’t just need to see you win.
They need to see you:
Miss a workout and come back anyway.
Get rejected and adjust.
Have a bad day and keep going.
Because one day, life will hit them hard.
And when it does, they won’t remember your pep talks.
They’ll remember watching you push through your own hard things.
One Simple Challenge
Pick one goal.
Nothing flashy.
Nothing perfect.
Start it now.
And do it where your kids can see it.
No announcement needed.
Just consistency.
Because your kids don’t need a dad who used to want things.
They need a dad who’s still in the game.
Until next time—
keep the fires burning.
– Clay
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